A day of reflection…

I got lots of messages yesterday, both on my Facebook page and as private messages. Yesterday’s article got quite a few reads too! What became clear yesterday was that if someone can’t control their jealousy it will always be there, eating away.

She had observed during Wednesday that she had never seen me happier. Well that was obvious, there were just the two of us, in a town that I find very relaxing, no thoughts of work etc. You’d think that she’d be happy, that it would prove that I was happy with her and at my happiest when we could get away together with no distractions.

Green-eyed monster

But of course the green-eyed monster dictated otherwise, and the conclusion was that it would put me in the mood to have sex with someone else when I am down here in May for the PCS Conference.

For those who don’t know me, I’m middle-aged, and grossly overweight. I don’t have the looks that make women fall at my feet, I never did and never will. Women who have liked me have never been instantly attracted, it’s always been more a case of getting to know the real person. Without a few weeks to get to know me, no-one is going to see what she sees, and believe me, 5 days is nowhere near enough!

Back home later

In any case, while with her, I just wouldn’t! It was no longer even a case of her finding out. I would know what I did, and that would have spoiled things enough.

Anyway, I’ll be heading back home this afternoon. I hope that I can shake off the way I am feeling, I’ve got friends, I’ve got my band, and I’ve got work next Tuesday, so, chin up, as they say.

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